The Truth About This Single Mom.

Having stepped back out onto the dating scene, I have learned some harsh untruths that are thrown at single moms. Granted there is always an element of truth behind every stereotype, but trust me, some of them are ssssoooo far from truth. Some of them are down right hurtful. Others only make the stubborn ones among us all the more stubborn.

As a single mom, you should just date whomever is willing to show interest. Umm, no. This heart is a valuable thing. Would you give the keys to your car to the first random person who asked to borrow it? No, you wouldn't. You wouldn't even consider giving your keys to some of your family members! That said, many of us have learned what it is to be hurt. We have learned some very valuable lessons and one of them is just how valuable our hearts are. We are ok waiting a few years to meet a guy who will treasure us, value us and be willing to be a team player.

Single moms are easy. FAR from truth! At least for this one. I understand the value of sex within marriage. Yes, I've been intimate with a man before, I have a son. But he was the only man, EVER. This statement may be true for some moms, but this statement can also be true for single men or women around us, sadly. I learned you have to give your heart and your emotions time to heal. Don't jump out of one relationship and hurry into another. You will be more likely to make another bad decision, add another hurt to the list. Therefore, if you are like this gal, you have let the hurts go and are ready to step forward into a healthy relationship with a healthy heart and healthy standards.

That girl comes with baggage. My little love is not baggage. He is the most amazing little man in the whole world. He is devoted to me, watches out for me, makes me laugh, makes me cry and gives me hugs when I'm having a hard day. He has taught me what true love is, what sacrifice is, what it means to be willing to give your life for another. One day, when you have your own pint sized blessing, you will understand just how awesome children are. You will know they are not a piece of unwanted baggage, but the most valuable thing that will enter your life.

Your are obviously not committed to the long term relationships. Once again, far from the truth. I spent a number of years doing everything I could think of to save a marriage that was not healthy. Sometimes we are left going- make this work and just deal with the mental/emotional/physical abuse or get out and give our child and ourselves a healthy, second chance at life. For me, my sons and my  health won out. But, I'm devoted. I want to be able to give my heart and the rest of my tomorrows to the man who God puts into my future.

There are many other things I'm sure other single parents have heard, these just happen to be the most common ones I've heard. We all have a story. Take the time to get to know us before you judge us and label us. The realty is that we have all made mistakes in our lives. We have all done something we wish we could change and take back. But at the end of the day, we still did it. It was our past. It makes up our story. We have learned from it, we have grown, we have changed. Yes, as a single mom, I am a bit more independent, I am a bit stronger, I am a bit more stubborn. I've had to be. I've had to make it and survive in a harsh world with not just myself, but also with the most important little man in my life right now.

There is One in Every Flock..... Or Two!

My original flock is now pushing the end of their third summer. Last years chickens, sadly, were lost to a coon. So this year we went all out. Forget that little addition of a dozen chicks, we got 26! Of course we went with a straight run for the unexpected pleasure of what we would get and knowing the extra boys would be freezer worthy. We, also, went with a mix of breeds. I got more black australorps, since I love the breed, but we decided to get some barred rocks and americanas.

I love looking up and seeing a mix of colors.

 All together we have 23 chickens- two roos and 21 busy girls. My older girls are still laying almost an egg a day. My younger girls are just starting to lay in the last two weeks. It's pretty exciting to be getting so many eggs every day. We did keep a roo from the babies. He is an australorp, but he has some copper feathering, catching him the name Copper. Copper was all black and then suddenly he got a few copper feathers. A few weeks later he got a few more feathers. I noticed more copper feathers coming in on his wings just today. Any idea why this is happening?

Copper in all his beauty.

The feathers get firey looking in the sun.

 So, back to the title. Every flock has that one bird. That special one. I happened to get two of them this time. I don't name my girls. I simply walk outside and say "Hey mamas" or "chick-a-roos" and they come running to greet me. But those two special ones, yep, they got names. Why you may ask.... so I know where to go searching!

 First is Betty. She's the real trouble maker. She will get out a half dozen times a day. Like out over the five foot tall fence. When Betty gets out, she doesn't hang around either. She takes off for a nice stroll in the woods. Betty recently got her wings clipped. I couldn't bear the thought of a stray cat getting her. She now gives me the evil eye.

Betty wouldn't pose for me.

 My other special one would be dear Dorthy. Dorthy is special in many ways. For starters we don't know what she is. She came as an americanna.... umm, no. Can this girl fly! Like clear the 40' run with out any issue and go right up and over the fence. I do have to say she is good about staying right by the fence when she is out, unlike Betty!

Dorthy after just getting put back into the run. Giving the stink eye!

Oh my chickens, how I adore them! They give such enjoyment and entertainment and the best eggs ever! Expect to see an entry on clipping chicken wings... Dorthy you are next!


This post has been shared at:
The HomeAcre Hop
Homestead Barn Hop
The Backyard Farming Connection Hop

His Joy in Eggs.

I find great joy when Z wants to help with things around the property. I mean it is nice when he is made to do things, but when my little 6 year old helper volunteers to help with things, it warms my heart.

His new big helper thing is the chickens. For the longest time he would not go near the chickens because Big Boy would charge the fence at him. But, I guess, he is now big enough and doesn't allow the chickens to intimidate him anymore. He now opens up their doors in he morning and helps to collect the eggs. I will keep working towards coop cleaning.... but he still has an issue with cleaning up someone else poop. Little does he remember my years to poop cleaning!

I wanted to reward him for all his help and I wanted it to be in a fun way. So I added some Americanas to my flock this year. I don't know who was more excited when the first blueish egg arrived. I knew it was coming and it would be soon, yet I was still way more excited then I should have been, haha! But, my Z was stunned. He first questioned if the chicken was ok and then proudly announced he wanted the first blue egg for breakfast.

The glorious three day bounty!

This post is linked to:
The Homeacre Hop

Who is that Chick?!

My life has been all over the board in the last two years. I've wanted to blog, but I just couldn't pull myself to focus on it. There was so much that needed my attention and I just needed time to find out who I was, where I was going and if there was any way to get there. Do I have all those answers yet? No! But my head is clear, I know who I am now.

This was me in June 2012--

Yeah.... packing extra pounds, insecure, hating who I was. I felt stuck in a situation and it wasn't good.

Fast forward to May and August, respectfully, of 2014--

Wooha! Who is that chick? I had to use two pics, I couldn't pick which I liked more. Surely that isn't the same gal? It is!! I'm gorgeous, I'm full of life, I've lost weight... and not at the gym... and I love me! I LOVE ME!

What made the transformation you ask? Well if you read any of my past posts you would know things were kinda all over during the last two years... if they even made it on here. I survived a divorce, I got my mind, emotions and health back in line. I spent time focusing on my son and myself. I've fought some hard battles but I've come out on top. I choose to not stop living, I chose to not give up.

I'm ready to blog again. Yes, I plan to keep on blogging about being healthy and living off of what you can bring forth on your own land, but I also want to talk about the ups and downs of being a single mom, insecurities of dating again. I want to talk about life. I've learned over the course of these last two years that there are sssssoooooooo many women, both married and single, that don't love themselves. I'm not talking being self centered, I'm talking looking in the mirror and despising what they see looking back at them. There are single moms who question if they are giving their child the best that they can, is it good enough, will they be a mature and responsible contribution to society. How about the crazy thoughts of dating again?! I have had a number of married women tell me they are so grateful they don't have to do that process again.

My life has been an interesting ride on many roads... crazy city roads at times! But, I've made it. I've found a nice country road with scenic views. It's beautiful here. Not perfect! I've driven through a few storms, over some potholes and have had to stop for the occasional deer who wants to hold me up, but I've made it. So, please join me. Let's encourage each other, support each other, help each other on this journey. And while we are at it, we can chase chickens, milk goats/cows, harvest an abundance of food and get a good work out. Will you join me? Will you be there during the ups and downs and laughs and tears?

A New Year.

Life keeps changing and moving fast. New people enter your life as old ones exit. I look forward to this year and all it may have in store for me. Perhaps this will be the year we get to move and start our country life.

So many people have been talking about their new years resolutions. I, personally, don't enjoy making resolutions. Most times they are above what is practical or capable. This year I have set goals for myself though. I would like to start dancing again. To gain my balance, to be able to do so gracefully. To daily read the bible with my son. To have lights out no later then 10:30, but to aim for 10. All practical and yet little things that will make daily life healthier.

Happy New Year!

Dream.

Do you know what is hard? When you know what you want and what you long for... but you don't know the details, the fine print. Then you have those moments where you think you see it. You think things are coming together, but then you realize no, it's not.

In all of this you still cant stop going forward, life doesn't stop. You have to keep going and just figure it out as it happens. One day all the pieces will fall into place, you will sit back and think of how that is so beautiful. It's perfect.

I'm a dreamer... a big dreamer. I dream of the impossible, the things that are too big to make sense. I'm happy with those dreams. I have gone a long time with out dreams, why not dream big now?  I serve a God who gives us the desires of our hearts, a God who enjoys making the impossible happen.

So dream away, dreamer!

Home School Advice Please

I love home schooling my son... most days. Like any child, he has days that he does amazing and he has days where nothing seems to make sense to him. I have days where I want to scream and must excuse myself from the room for a few minutes so I don't and days where I am amazed at his progress.

He is in second grade now. I feel that I should be able to leave him at the table to work on a page while I do something in the same room. He, however, becomes helpless when I am not by his side giving him my complete attention. How do you other parents handle your kids? Do you feel they should be able to do some of their schooling with out you pointing at every single word they need to read? How do I teach my son to be independent with the easy papers?