Dream.

Do you know what is hard? When you know what you want and what you long for... but you don't know the details, the fine print. Then you have those moments where you think you see it. You think things are coming together, but then you realize no, it's not.

In all of this you still cant stop going forward, life doesn't stop. You have to keep going and just figure it out as it happens. One day all the pieces will fall into place, you will sit back and think of how that is so beautiful. It's perfect.

I'm a dreamer... a big dreamer. I dream of the impossible, the things that are too big to make sense. I'm happy with those dreams. I have gone a long time with out dreams, why not dream big now?  I serve a God who gives us the desires of our hearts, a God who enjoys making the impossible happen.

So dream away, dreamer!

Home School Advice Please

I love home schooling my son... most days. Like any child, he has days that he does amazing and he has days where nothing seems to make sense to him. I have days where I want to scream and must excuse myself from the room for a few minutes so I don't and days where I am amazed at his progress.

He is in second grade now. I feel that I should be able to leave him at the table to work on a page while I do something in the same room. He, however, becomes helpless when I am not by his side giving him my complete attention. How do you other parents handle your kids? Do you feel they should be able to do some of their schooling with out you pointing at every single word they need to read? How do I teach my son to be independent with the easy papers? 

Turkeys!

It has been sad to go out the door and see the empty run in the front. It is sad to not have sweet Violet to greet me daily, as if she were a dog. So to make good use of the space, we brought our turkeys home. We have four of them and we had been keeping them at a friends house with her turkeys.

My opinion on turkeys hasn't changed much by having them... I think turkeys are ugly. However, I do greatly enjoy the calls and sounds they make during the day. It's a new adventure and it is something fun.

Coons. Ugh.

A week ago we got 5 sweet chicks. We put them in the front run with Violet and Little It. It was a week of great enjoyment watching them flip around and freak out Violet and It. As the older, more mature two...haha, right... Violet and It would just keep their distance. However, Violet would let us know, in her motherly way, if one of the chicks was in trouble.

When we went to let the chickens out this morning, something was wrong. The front coop door was pried open a few inches. The chicks and Little It were mutilated. Sweet Violet had a gaping hole in her side and her little head was torn up. She laid on her back unable to move, but still breathing. It was horrible.

I told my dad I never wanted to be the life taker. I would raise whatever we needed, but he was to be the life taker. As I looked at her, she blinked and opened her mouth and closed it. I started to cry. My father was an hour away at work. My mom was suppose to meet a friend to process some meat birds. It was left to me. I went down to the garage and got an ax. I made my way up to the coop. Told my dear, sweet Violet I was so sorry and swung. Then, like any mature lady, I sat down and cried and cried. My hands were shaking so bad. It was horrible. The sight.

You sit there and go, if only I had the windows open and didn't use the air conditioner last night. If only I had double checked the door to make sure it was as tight as it could be. But, in the end you have to sit back and say it is part of how life goes. You win some, you lose some. You cry, then you get up, dust off your pants and rejoice, because the other half of the flock was safe in their coop. You still have eggs for tomorrow. The day goes on.

 

Me with little Oyster and Porcelain

Amazing How Life Changes.

It is amazing how my life has changed in one year. I feel like a whole new person. I have walked through a lot of stuff this past year. I had my ups and my downs. I let the blog go for a spell to focus on me. But it has all been good.

Peaceful.

I have been getting out hiking more and more. Oh how I missed hiking. And let's just say....after years of not being able to be as active as I wish.... we are out of shape!! I have been to a few different places exploring God's creation. I have many more on my list that I plan to enjoy. I love land that is hardly touched by man...the clam that hangs in the air, the peace that surrounds you. It feels like freedom to me. Perfect in all ways.

Beautiful!

Bowling

I have also gotten to enjoy so much with my little man. Z and I have been able to go to the park and camp out in the yard. We have enjoyed fires in the fire pit. We have hiked a bit together. He loves to explore the woods now that he is getting older. It reminds me of when I was young. He is sucking everything up in his little brain and
becoming a wealth of knowledge. It is amazing  to watch his little mind at work. We have also been able to go bowling about once a week through the summer weeks. And because I am such a good mom... on one of our outdoor outings, I made him take his shoes off and dip his toes in a little creek. Mind you, there was a lot of protest, but every child needs to know what it is like to walk in fresh water!

Get those feet wet!

Fishing OC

Back in June, I attempted to fish at the shore for the first time....well lets just say the sea gulls were great entertainment! There were seven of us along the shore line fishing and of the seven of us, one gentleman caught a skate. The rest of us, well, we just seemed to be feeding the invisible fish that we could feel and see making our rods bounce, but they just wouldn't take the hook with the bait. My friend E did almost hook a sea gull though. That was a little humoring watching it grab the line and dive into the water to get free. And just for the record, it did get free and was uninjured. It was a beautiful June day. It was windy and cold (hence the crazy hair and hoodie!).

And as if this isn't enough excitement to post at one time, I also started to play my bass guitar again. I have greatly missed this part of my life... just like I have missed so much of everything else! There is an amazing band that has asked me to play as needed and I have been blessed by them. It has been a bit of a learning experience for me as well! Learning new music, learning to play their style. I've also learned that when you are playing outdoor gigs... even with a good sound check.... you can hardly hear once you start to play!

July 4th gig.

A lot has changed. I am happy and content with life. I am ready to move on to the next phase of my life. I am excited to see how it will unfold and who will be apart of it. God is good, He has watched out for me and He continues to guide me.

Z is Amazing!

So Z turned 5 in December. He is homeschooling in first grade. Sometimes I question if I started him in school too soon, as he is only suppose to start kindergarten this coming fall. I question if he is up to par for first grade. He is doing well with math, science, history... but is he where he should be in English? His writing is amazing.

Z's copy work.

So I decided to have him read me a beginner book yesterday. He did it! With very little struggle. So, today he read me another book! And he started walking around the house saying random words sounding them out and spelling them. He, out of excitment, runs to me saying "Mom, Mom I can spell....."

I'm so proud of him. I'm so proud of myself. Even though I feel like I may not be doing enough for him, he is getting it and excelling!

Our First Casualty

It has happen. It is something you kind of know in the back of your head is very possible. Yet, you hope it wont happen to you.

Last night we were invited to dinner with friends. It was a meal that need to happen. We meet at a local restaurant and expected to be home within two hours... around the time the last of the chickens head into the coop. We ended up getting home about 45 minutes later then expected. It was dark and my dad simply walked up and dropped the door and latched it closed. Nothing seemed out of place.

Well this morning I took the dogs out and went to get the chickens out. As I started up the hill, I noticed a few black feathers... further up there were a lot more. I panicked. My girls are all black. I ran the last bit to the coop, threw the door open and pulled up their door. One by one they poped out into the run and I counted. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.... No! I looked in the coop... empty. I looked back in the run and counted again and third time just to be safe. 10 chickens! One of them was gone!

I walked around and saw nothing more than the piles of feathers in the yard. No holes were dug under the fence. The coop was untouched. My best guess is that a girl flew over the fence, again, and a stray cat got her. Probably the orange one that tends to watch the chickens from time to time. I know a neighbor with chickens has scarred the cat off with a bb gun a number of times.

I wanted to know what chicken was gone. Honestly, I hoped it was Little It.  But a quick glance told me Big Boy and Little It were in the run. So I crouched down close to the fence and the girls were nervous to come near me. They stayed huddled in the center. Big Boy placed himself between me and the girls and kicked his feathers at me. Big Boy was so upset, usually he ran to greet me and let me pet him. After a little cooing the girls slowly broke up and cautiously made their way to me. I first checked to see if Big Momma was there... love that girl!... she was. Then I ran down the list. Violet, Tulip, Rose, Lily.... Lily? Scan again. No, Lily was not there. My precious Lily...she is always good at flying the coop. Lily, the one chicken from the get go as chicks, who loved to be held and stroked. Lily and Big Momma were always the first to greet you at the fence edge. When we sat on the log, Lily always pushed her way up to your lap to be held. Now, Little Lily will not be there to do any of that.

When you start off with chickens, you know that they are easy prey. You know that you will probably lose one or two along the way. Yet when it happens, it is a sad reminder of how life goes. And of course it had to be one of the favorites....

Spring is Coming!

February is ending and March is arriving. Boy am I excited! It's time to order chicks, start working the dirt in the garden, order seeds, start seeds. It's time to get my hands dirty again!

Even the birds seem happy to have a blue sky!

 It's time to break out the dresses and flip flops. Time to feel the breeze in your hair and sun on your face. It's time to sit by a fire, watch the stars, lay in a hammock.

Can you tell I love spring time?

I'm looking forward to watching the bounty of the garden gathered daily, the chickens getting free time in the yard, my son being able to play and get muddy everyday outside.

Z and Joy Bells having fun.

Hmmm. Feels good to just think about it, now I'm ready to get it going and happening!

I'm Ready for the Country.

Every now and then you have one of those days where you are so ready to move to the country and stop dreaming. Today is one of those days for me. I've been dreaming for the last 4 years. I've been saying one day. And today, as we have our like third month of gray skies, I sit here and go "God, I'm ready. I'm really ready to move and get these dreams sent into motion." I so look forward to working the land, the animals, seeing thousands of stars at night, the smell of the country, the lack of traffic noise. My heart is heavy with longing. I know one day soon it shall be, but today is just one of those days that I wish one day was today.

Because a Life is Valuable

Is it a passion for life? Is it simply caring? Has it been lost? Or has it become blind?

Sunday afternoon, my mother and I were driving out to a local market, when I noticed a young guy standing on the edge of the over pass above us. It instantly stilled my breath. That stretch of highway has no shoulder, it is simply a four lane high way separated in the middle by a barrier and the side of the bridge on either side. We immediately pulled over and I called 911.

After speaking with the operator she told us we could drive on. But it didn’t seem right. So we waited for the cops to arrive. We prayed for his safety and peace of mind. Every now and then he would swing his arms out in front of himself, then drop them and wipe his face. We watched At least 100 cars pass this young man, and not one stopped. How many passed prior to our stopping and calling for help?

You might say, maybe he was out for a stroll or you were responding off of an adrenaline rush. Yes, we sure had adrenaline coursing through our bodies, but nobody would just stand out there, up on the very edge of the wall, in 28 degree weather with wind gusting up to 30 miles per hour. 

So, there we were sitting in the car, waiting and waiting for the cops to arrive. We wanted to help somehow, but we weren’t sure about walking out to him. Holding our breath every time he swung his arms out in front of him, finally, a cop arrived. He walked out to talk to the young man, but they didn’t move. Then another cop arrived, one standing on either side. After a few moments more, the man stepped down from the top of the wall and they walked to the side of the bridge.  Finally, we could breath again… sort of. The adrenaline was so high, we started shaking, ya know that limp my legs wont work feeling.

We sat on the side of the road for a total of 15 minutes from the time we first saw him till they walked off the bridge. No one else stopped. While I was on the phone with emergency personal, no one else had called the gentleman in. Has our world really become so blind? Or perhaps numb? The human life is still far more important than what is for dinner, or getting to a friends house, or what’s on tv. We have to be there for each other, we need to care.  My hope is this young man is getting help for whatever is going on.

My Valentine

Tonight I have a hot date. He is the most handsome of them all. He makes me laugh and smile. He has made me cry, but mostly laugh and smile. He is my everything and I can't imagine my life with out him!

My Little Man :)

He felt Joy Bells need a pic too.

Collecting Eggs in the Winter

I was down at the feed store to get layer feed. The person behind the counter told me to not bother with layer feed during the winter. I asked why, my girls are still laying and they just gave me a weird look. This is our first winter with chickens. How many eggs are you collecting right now? I'm in Pennsylvania and I'm collecting on average 6 eggs a day from my 9 girls. Just wondering how everyone else is doing collecting eggs during the winter months.

A basket of eggs.

This blog is connected to:
Homestead Barn Hop 93
Winter on the Homeacre Hop
Backyard Farming Connection Hop 14

Friday Feel Good Moment

The snow has fallen, the earth is silent. It is as if the world around has stopped to stare at the wonder before us. A soft whisper of the wind dances about the trees. As the last rays of light sink beneath the horizon, the cool of the night wraps around your shoulders.

The stillness, the silence. The nothingness. The snows glow awakens the crispness of of the cool night. And there, in that moment you lift your eyes to the heavens and, in wonder, you take in the perfection of the creator. The heavens, spotless of clouds, fresh in the storms pass open wide to a hundred stars.

Right there for just a moment, you are able to take in such stillness and perfection, such peace and beauty.

New Year, New Me.

I'm not one for new years resolutions. I don't like starting something that is most likely not going to be completed. So, thankfully I started going to the gym a number of months ago!

However, this is a new year. And I'm excited for it to be a chance for a new me! Over the last six months a lot has changed in my life. A LOT! I plan to close the last of the cracked open doors and move on to  the doors at the end of the hall that are starting to open wide. My future lies a head not behind. I can set goals, goals can be good if they are realistic, but I wont set resolution goals.

No one can guaranteed where we will be in a couple of months, so how can we set goals for 12 months from now... especially when most of them are unrealistic? With how my life has changed, I know that is not practical for me.

Did you make resolutions you feel wont make it to the summer? Or did you just skip making any in fear of letting yourself down? I say do away with the year long resolutions and simply make goals for short term.

By years end I plan to be a pretty amazing woman.... but that plan will come to be by taking small steps along the way!