Monday, May 14, 2012

Fishing Humor

This weekend we went to a fishing rodeo with my parents and one each of my nieces and nephews, as well as our son. Wow, was it exciting… and oh ssssssooooo boring at the same time.  Yes, it was both, believe it or not.

Lets do the run down. We were up bright and early, scarfed down breakfast and tried to nicely wake our little trooper. He’s a 9 o’clock kind of riser... let’s just say he didn’t think the morning was so beautiful at 7:30.

Then it was off to my parents place, next to my brother’s to get the two middle kids, and finally on the road to the rodeo. We have three bubbling, now that they are all awake, little ones filled with excitement of catching fish. With the limit of five fish a kid, their little eyes were swimming with anticipation. 

The drive there was uneventful, just another drive down paved roads with yellow lines running down the middle………… until…….(can you feel the suspense?) …….. we turned down…….. a dirt road. Not a biggy right?  Haha wrong! This dirt road has a speed bump sign about 10 to 20 feet in. Let me just explain this speed bump sign to you. Are you ready? Well what this sign is really saying is, BEWARE, TRAVEL AT YOUR OWN RISK. I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure at the bottom of the sign it read in fine print- “Muhahaha, I see you little Ford Focus and I’m going to eat you for breakfast. Or at least try.” Oh yes, you read that correctly, we have a little Ford Focus. 

So anyways, back to the road. There was about three miles of dirt road ahead of us, hardly big enough for two cars.  There were some “pot holes” as expected, except said pot holes were more like craters that jostled and tossed us back and forth.  Trying to keep up with my parents in their larger, dirt road approved vehicle was nearly impossible. Hoping to keep up with the dust trail we guessed a few times on whether to go right or left. Finally we came to a field that had a number of trucks and SUVs parked in it... and my parent’s vehicle. Phew, we’re safe! Guess again! I think every gopher in a ten-mile radius lived in this field. Don’t let the kids take off running!!!

So we are now out of the car, but not before feeling a little car sick, but we are out! We head through the path towards the pond. The trio still excited, so excited they want to help carry everything. We pick out a promising spot. Oh yes, this is a good spot. Right towards the middle, fish jumping and a really big brown trout casually swimming by. The minutes counting down, a couple dozen little ones excited for their lines to be cast out. Excited family members standing ready, nets by their sides. And a pond stocked, stocked full so we’re told. 

Still waiting, minutes still ticking. Finally, the guy at the head of the pond calls out a few words… couldn’t hear many of them, but we new when everyone started to cast, it was time! Yes, finally time! We cast all three lines in. The little ones excited and ready to real in, but no you must wait, wait for the bobber to drop below the surface or the tip of the rod to bounce. Wait? That was hard, very hard for them. The girl next to us brings in a rainbow trout, the trio runs to check it out. Oh man, now they are EXCITED! When will it be their time? Then it happens my niece’s rod bounces, Pop Pop grabs it and they start to bring it in. We can see it, its beautiful about 13 inches. Z and Raf grab the net and go to grab it and………WHAT!!!! It didn’t, oh yes it did! It broke off the line!!!!! Oh no, she was crushed. And then we see it. We are 30 minutes into the rodeo. Kids are now tapping out with their 5 fish. The trio, still at zero.  But, we don’t give up. We are casting and waiting, waiting and casting. The trio exploring tad poles, and sticks and the random canoes sitting way down in the woods. Then it happens, for real this time! My nieces hooks another again! She’s off reeling again, with all her might. Raf and Z are ready, net in hand. Then it happens… it breaks off the line again! Are you kidding me?!?!

The trio needed a break, so they went with Nay Nay to get their free hot dogs.  We have been very patient, We watched kid after kid get their five and leave. Very happy family/friends at their sides. It is now almost four hours of being at the pond, its lunch time. The kids are very hungry. Their breakfast dogs didn’t hold over for very long. It’s time to pack it up and head home.  My son was pleased to smile for the camera with the total catch.
Hey now! Don’t laugh! We tried five kinds of power bait, worms, bread, and we even stuped so low as to try some hot dog. Yes, we really walked away with nothing. Three kids, zero fish. But in nice mocking jester that big twentyish inch brown trout swam by us on a regular basis to remind us there really were fish in the pond.

Then as if to add salt to the wound, we had to make it out of the field and back down that crater filled dirt road.

My conclusion as to why we didn’t catch any fish. Well, I sure did think about it and this is what I came up with. God wanted to laugh.  Yep it was that simple and He also wanted to remind us of our hearts desires. We want to eat healthy, we want to be healthy and we want to do it naturally. Last time I checked, farm raised fish didn’t fit into any of that. Nope, next time I’ll just find a horse and ride far, far out into the wilderness and fish in a random pond or stream. Maybe then I’ll be able to get some fresh, healthy fish….. and skip the dirt roads in small cars too! 

**Just a warning to the wise, stay away from dirt roads with speed bump sings!
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